Batten down the hatches! Weigh anchor and hoist the mizzen! Shiver me timbers, Talk Like a Pirate Day is today. Aye today, gar. Ye best be on the ready if ye know what's good for you, lest ye be fixin' t' hang from the yardarm by a necktie instead. Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!
If ye think ye bra'e enough, blood-thirsty enough, black-hearty enough, well bucko, har be a list o' phrases t' be sure your pirate speak is shipshape. Use `em far and wide, but use `em wisely. The cap'n keelhauls bilge-suckin' scallywags - ye may find yourself pickin' barnacles from ye starboard knacker for a fortnight, savvy?
Ahoy! - Hello!
A merry yarn - A good story
Booty - Treasure
Shiver me timbers - I'm scared, my legs be shaking.
Shocked to the very boney - That's surprising.
Three sheets to the wind - Very drunk.
Weigh anchor and hoist the mizzen! - Pull up anchor, let's go sailing.
Yarr. - I agree.
Yarr! - I see your point, and mightily agree.
Yarr? - What did you say?
Whether ye be an old salt or a landlubbin' lass with a gust' for guff, pay note: Today is a day t' make merry and honor the briny deep. So come aboard, ye scur'y dogs, and brin' ye old bottle o' rum. It's by the board for the rest o' ye rapscallions and off t' Da'y Jones' Locker with ye. Gar.
Dead men tell no tales,
Second Mate Nikki "Parrot Got Me Eye" Smythe